Saturday, March 15, 2008
So there it is, all up and ready. The gallery woman kept looking at my face asking "Don't you just love it?" I couldn't help being blank and sort of empty feeling. I felt bad that I was not ecstatic at the end of it as I should be. I feel sad at it, all those thoughts and hours hanging up in the open. They are no longer my own or should I rather say ours. They hang up there for everyone to have now. It is a funny thing to feel a loss of them. Here they are all dressed up and formal. Their conversation is silent to me now and I find I miss hearing it. For so long they pulled me, told me what to do, mixed with his voice as I worked in a beautiful intimacy. I must start my new work soon, get into some new thing so I do not have this listlessness for very long. Things are coming up this summer and I will jump into them soon. I do have much to do, somethings I must edit and write but I am so listless today. I even took a nap which I never do.
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3 comments:
Putting your deepest creative soul out in public... sharing with strangers. Almost feels like a violation of sorts?
The most intimate and private revealed makes one want to hide, sometimes. The artist at their most vulnerable.
And, after all that energy has been expended, exhaustion would not be surprising.
I hope it goes well for you, Corby.
true true, I have been sleepy, but it will go well. I am full of a quiet joy about it.
-Corby
I hope you are feeling rested & quietly confident now that you have seen your paintings hanging for all to see & admire.No doubt you are exhausted as you have put yourself, heart & soul into this work, you feel exposed but I'm sure it will all be worth it. Good luck and please let us know, maybe you could post some of your paintings on your Blog.
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