The fountains mingle with the river
And the rivers with the ocean,
The winds of Heaven mix for ever
With a sweet emotion;
Nothing in the world is single,
All things by a law divine
In one spirit meet and mingle -
Why not I with thine?

See the mountains kiss high Heaven
And the waves clasp one another;
No sister-flower would be forgiven
If it disdained its brother;
And the sunlight clasps the earth,
And the moonbeams kiss the sea -
What are all these kissings worth
If thou kiss not me?



-Shelley -Love's Philosophy

Outraged Ring-Billed Gull

Hello all,

This week is going to be extremely busy. I hope to find pockets of relaxation time, but there are many demands on me right now.
Today I got out anyway for a bit. I went to the waterfront which in my city is full of industrial waste and a new wind farm. I did not see many migrants, other then some white-crowned sparrows and one lonely killdeer. The killdeer had a broken leg and did not suffer long. An immature peregrine falcon flew past at warp speed and caught himself a killdeer breakfast. I am working with an older extended lens for photography which is no where near the clarity of my newer one that is being repaired. (yes that whole water issue) I did manage to sneak in some terrific shots of a group of turkey vultures who practically posed in front of the wind turbines for me. Lovely and very paintable and so not seen on this blog. (I do keep all of my best photos to myself so that I can use them as references)

I rescued a ring-billed gull that had gotten stuck in the muck on the waters edge. He was very emaciated and did not put up much of a fight. He is hopefully getting the treatment he needs at the vets. I do not have the time anymore to care for them myself. I miss it and rather enjoyed having a rescue today, although I have great sympathy for the injured bird. It is always a thrill to hold a wild bird.

One backing the other

I have had a good chance to reflect on some of my paintings. Normally I race on ahead to the next one and leave the others, finding the flaws in them so apparent. So today I framed them for a show and lovingly patched any scratches. I got a chance to see them again as I had when I danced my brush over them. I felt the space they were born in as they grew out of lines on canvas. I took some time to look over the discoveries I encountered in them and remember the magic I felt as I reached a new level with my skills. These little moments are caught and go to be displayed. Perhaps someone else will discover something in them and give them a new life away from me.

The O'Keeffe Crib

I don't have much tonight, I have work to get to. Do know I have my first ever solo art show (it is at a tiny venue, but still)... So I am busy getting my work ready for the set-up day. It seems my art career is slowly leaving the ground. Otherwise I have been generally not so comfortable since I am dealing with a serious bout of poison ivy. This is bad timing as I want to look decidedly fabulous for my show and will have some lovely rose red patches on me in some not so easy to hide places. I am not overly vain, but it is slightly disfiguring and I want to look damn sexy. It is difficult to type with a cat laying on your arms and part of the laptop. So off I go, trying not to scratch but so badly wanting to.

Pike Skull

I am so eager to keep on under the influence of what is round me here-and develop myself-I know it will be worth it to myself and to anyone who may be interested-I am past the point of having ambitions other than for my work-I have but the one object and I have learned economy through experience and do not interest myself in the game of being the well to do artist. I merely want to prove my right to what I venture to believe mat be true-and what you yourself generously say, that I am an artist. I do not as you know also-aspire to greatness or outward success-I merely aspire toward perfecting myself-and I can do most toward this end at this time here where the atmosphere and general conditions are conducive to growth.

-Madsen Hartley in a letter to Alfred Stieglitz from the book, My Dear Stieglitz

Someone had a wonderfully calm way of making the craziness of today seem to vanish for a few moments.

I really needed this today- it is a rather funny video I found on Udge's blog.

Slicing Ginger

Not sex. Not sex,
but sexual: the way
the weather hangs
at the edges of sight,
the way the paring knife,
pressed and warm as any
lover to my hand, slides
just under the soaked
brown skin, opening
the earth of it, opening
the undiscovered, white-
fleshed seam in the scarred
and sacred earth:
lemon-sweet, lemon-
sweet ringing of bodies
through the room.
Plumes of longing bleed
in my hand as the small
blade pares into the
mole-blind, uprooted,
incantatory fruit-the
slices hitting the
hot oiled iron with
a singing of fire on
wet wood, and the tiny
suns exploding there:
huge and redolent and
almost human.

By Frank Black from Turning Over the Earth

The last day of summer bumblebee

Unrequited

Bury it under layer over caustic layer
the small jewel of the center
it's memory sweet
as it's old illusion
and as you look into it
you can dream
but covered well
it survives harbored
under a thousand old wishes
impermeable in it's centered shell
as it waits for other lifetimes
the core is pure
it can stand the weight

-By the Corbyhawk herself

Now the fact is
that there is hardly
a roadside pond or pool
which has not as much
landscape in it as above it.
It is not the dull,
muddy, brown thing
we suppose it to be;
it has a heart like ourselves,
and in the bottom of that
there are the boughs
of the tall trees, and the
blades of the shaking grass,
and all manner of hues,
of variable, pleasant light
out of the sky; nay,
the ugly gutter that stagnates
over the drain bars,
in the heart of the foul city,
is not altogether base;
down in that, if you look
deep enough, you may see
the dark, serious blue
of far-off sky, and the passing
of pure clouds.

-From John Ruskin Considers the Nature of Water, Circa 1842
-found in Ruskin's Modern Painters discovered by me in Ralph Black's book Turning Over the Earth. He is a poet I met yesterday evening who read to all of us which is always delicious to the soul. I will be posting some of his work soon.
My life, well it is utter chaos lately.

Notched

I feel like my life is suddenly on fast forward and I am unable to catch up. All of these things are happening around me and I cannot seem to get enough done. It is all good stuff but I am overwhelmed. I have this funny feeling that it is not going to slow down any time soon and this hectic pace will become the norm. My emotions are just as chaotic under the surface.

This bird can really travel, check it out here

Darkness, Darkness
Be my pillow
Take my head
And let me sleep
In the coolness of your shadow
In the silence of your deep

Darkness, Darkness
Hide my yearning
For the things I cannot be
Keep my mind from constant turning
Toward the things I cannot see now
Things I cannot see now
Things I cannot see

-From Darkness Darkness performed by the Cowboy Junkies written by Jesse Colin Young

When I woke up today I felt better and wasn't as sad as yesterday. I can't really explain why since reality has not changed in the least. I guess it just is as it is and that is ever all. I also had a really good day on my work and KNOW it is what I should be painting.

in the darkness

They name thee before me,
A knell to mine ear;
A shudder comes o'er me—
Why wert thou so dear?
They know not I knew thee,
Who knew thee too well:—
Long, long shall I rue thee
Too deeply to tell.

In secret we met—
In silence I grieve
That thy heart could forget,
Thy spirit deceive.

-From Lord Byron "When We Two Parted"

Dead head deer

It is self-understood that you have made progress. My faith in you as an artist has never wavered for one instant as long as I have known you. That really means that I know that you must develop as you grow. In other words you cannot but help be yourself. That is all that means anything to me in anybody.

-Alfred Stieglitz in a letter to Madsen Hartley from My Dear Stieglitz

I had the most amazing dream last night. I was walking through a huge field of jimson weed flowers which I always think of as moon flowers for some reason. They were beautiful and I was searching for the perfect one for a painting. There were colorful birds everywhere and the sun was full and bright. I was walking with someone and all of a sudden the sky changed into a sunset with puffy clouds. Suddenly huge birds flew over us. I grabbed the persons arm and said grus americana! (Ok I am a total bird nerd because I used the latin name in my dream) They were whooping cranes! Of course the dreaded alarm went off right then, but the great feeling of the dream lasted into the day.

star crossed
and one fell blazing
unable to meet his eye
molten core exploding
and all for him
shine shine shine

the universe is great my dear
his wise mouth would say
age had taken him
and left him hollow
still for him
shine shine shine

am I bright enough
worry worry away
does he see my hunger
go home go home
don't be weak he'll know
still for him
shine I try shine shine

star crossed silly girl
you scare them all
bright burning
one by one we fall
still for him
always just for him
write write write

Landscape near Ghost Ranch

Don't fade away
My brown-eyed (man)
Come walk with me
I'll fill your heart with joy
And we'll dance through our isolation
Seeking solace in the wisdom we bestow
Turning thoughts to the here and everafter
Consuming fears in our fiery halos

Say what you mean
Mean what you say
I've heard that innocence
Has led us all astray

But don't let them make you and break you
The world is filled with their broken empty
dreams
Silence is their only virtue
Locked away inside their silent screams

But for now
Let us dance away
This starry night
Filled with the glow of fiery stars
And with the dawn
Our sun will rise
Bringing a symphony of bird cries

Don't bring me down now
Let me stay here for awhile
You know life's too short
Let me bathe here in your smile
I'm transcending
The fall from the garden

Goodnight
-Dead Can Dance Don't Fade Away

Killdeer

We were like two amazons of old and I can stretch to my full height beside her. Unafraid we walk in pace effortlessly and I want to carry a bit of her strength and knowledge of her own power. Ah, I am SOOOOOO tired that I cannot be poetic, just simple tonight.
A little red haired girl with thick glasses drew a picture of herself and did not show me. She whispered that she looked kind of weird in it and her little cheeks flushed. I pointed to my example and whispered back that I look kind of weird in mine too. She nodded and promptly picked up her picture to join the others. Ha! I adore her already!

A silly time waster but some are crazy funny.

Animals have problems too

Crimson Star Adenium

Won't you walk me through the Tiergarten?
Won't you walk me through it all, darling?
Doesn't matter if it is raining
Won't you walk me through it all?

Even if the sun, it is blazing
Even if the snow, it is raging
All the elements, we must conquer
To get to the other side of town

I have suffered shipwreck against your dark brown eyes
I have run aground against your broken down smiles
Believe me when I tell you I have no place to go
But to go where the wild flowers grow and the stone gardens bloom.

Won't you walk me through the Tiergarten?
Won't you walk me through it all, darling?
Doesn't matter if it is raining,
We'll get to the other side of town.

-Tiergarten by Rufus Wainwright

The day sucked. Work drama and heartache leading to intense frustration. Then I got a call that was a clear beacon in an otherwise murky day. I know I am being obtuse but I won't give it all away. That would be silly. Some people should work a bit and they would see the same thing below the surface which is not so easily hidden. DREAM and DARE and TRY and HOPE it can be despite the obstacles.

Georgia's Tree

One of those stumbling over myself days and I wonder why I just cannot be more, well more something. Only little me though, see this is what it is and that is about it.

Round Goby

I have been having such strange and rather startlingly accurate dreams. In one I was having a conversation with a fish. All kinds of conclusions were reached, what is real?